mixin' it up

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In the beginning, the Moog synthesizer met the 8-track recording system, and thus began the days of innovative audio mixing with very expensive electronic equipment. It was good and there was much rejoicing. Nay, it was great!

Of course, only a privileged few, with the limitless financial backing of their recording companies, could create the innovative musical style that still influences our tunes today.

Things are much easier now. Almost 50 years later, all you need is a few $20 in the bank and a half-baked desire to become a recording artist. The power to mix sounds with say, one of those Stanton dj mixers has never been more tempting.

Yet, with this great power comes great responsibility, as that great philosopher, Spiderman, once said. Really great. Human history is full of great examples of disastrous mixing. Over 100 years ago, someone mixed the Blue and the Gray and started a Civil War. Certainly not great. The extremely talented Richard Pryor (who is beyond great) told of the time he mixed pasteurize milk with low-fat milk, added a cookie and accidentally set himself on fire. (And ended up with a great, though painful, routine.)

So how do we stop anyone from easily mixing the unnatural with the unholy and creating musically grating terror? For example, what is there to stop someone from mixing the passionate sounds of Spanish music with a horn section of a German polka band? The next thing you know, Mexican restaurants will be filled with the sounds of Banda.

Okay, perhaps we're too late on that. But hopefully someone will think twice before mixing, say, rap with bluegrass music. Wouldn't the world sound a little better without having to worry about ... oh, square dance music. Okay, sorry, another bad example.

All I'm pointing out is that we have to be on guard against corrupting the electronic harmonies started 50 years ago. If we let some mixed-up kid get his or her hands on a cheap mixer, who knows what disasters will be unleashed on the world! The next thing you know we'll have peanut butter in our chocolate, confusion over bird calls and short computer messages, and hours of reality TV shows with rich, untalented people.

Don't mind me. I'm just trying to mix it up. Great.