Thursday, February 25, 2010

got to pass this one along

As you might know, I get $5 for putting linked phrases into posts. The good side is that I can write whatever I like with the phrases so long as I'm not vulgar or detrimental to the link. The bad side is that more and more of my assignments deal with weight products or skin care issues. How many ways can you make "weight loss" entertaining before hitting a brick wall of writer's block? Last week, I received one phrase that was almost impossible to write with. "Almost impossible" he said with a sly wink. After thinking I had reached my limits, here's what I wrote. What do you think?

Saturday, February 20, 2010

Pimple Power

Even when you cross that half-century mark of age, you're still plagued by random cases of acne. The thing about these pimples is that they tend to appear all over your body. While you can find information on top acne treatment for your face, there doesn't seem to be anything for bottom acne treatment. This is understandable. You shouldn't have to worry about people seeing the pimples on your butt ... unless you live in a nudist colony.

In any case, as an adult with a obvious pimple on the end of your nose, you can have an advantage in public situations. It's not like when you were a teenager and you didn't want people fixating on your facial train wreck of a skin condition. Now, as an adult standing in front of a room full of important business people, you can count on them staring at that painful looking rhino growth. Like a hypnotic wand, you point with your nose. You direct your audience's attention with your nose. When you want your audience to unconsciously agree with you, you slowly move your nose up and down while watching your public nod their head as they track your newly acquired albeit temporary facial deformity. When that happens, you'll realize that there is power behind the pizza face!

Info Overloaded

You may have heard your friends complain that there's too much information on the Internet. And understandably so. It seems you start researching one topic and soon find yourself down the rabbit hole of something completely different. Sometimes you find yourself compelled to obey the command "click here" even though you know it's only site related to dieting.

Maybe the problem isn't so much about information overload as it is about a failure of our personal filters. We tend to surf the web like two-year olds in a toy store, bouncing from one enticing aisle to another and frustrating ourselves because we can't get to all the toys quick enough. As an adult going through the same toy store, we know what we're looking for. With a cursory glance at the endless enticing choices available, we quickly filter out what we don't want and focus on finding those desirable goodies that we wanted in the first place.

To keep us from being overwhelmed when we're using the Internet, perhaps we should use the same process of filtering. This could mean having your e-mail program automatically organize your incoming messages into descriptive folders for later viewing. Or restricting your favorite topics to one or two top-notch sites. Or better yet, using that ultimate filter --- the computer's off button.

Friday, February 19, 2010

Update on work

During the first week into December, the business numbers looked bleak compared to the company's overly optimistic and misguided projections. The owners and investors quickly implement furloughs and pay-cuts for all of us worker bees. By the end of December, the numbers turned out to be very close to their original higher-than-normal goals. Surprisingly, January turned out to be a record sales month. Now February is also looking to be much better than the numbers given to the bank. Yet, the furloughs and pay cuts remain. Kind of reminds me of a skin condition --- a 'rash' decision that has turned into a nasty eczema with festering employee resentment and rapidly decaying morale.

Business is picking up for several surrounding companies as well. With the departure of a couple more employees to these prospering businesses, this may be the medicine that kills the blundering patient.

Thursday, February 11, 2010

College bound ... again

I've been asked to review Western Governors Online University's site at This request came at a good time. I've just finished my umpth phone interview with lots of kudos about my experience. But without having all of my training and classes coalesced into one overrated piece of paper know as a degree, I keep losing out on the jobs. So what I need to do is return to college. But I don't have time and money to retake every class again. WGU states that they will let you progress through your course work at your own speed. And if you can prove that you know the material, you may be able to jump ahead. But the wording on their isn't very promising. I get the impression that you could be a qualified nurse and working on your rn to bsn online with them and still not be qualified enough to get your BSN in record time unless lots of time on your hands.

I'm looking at the IT Technology degree which requires 121 "Competency Units". WGU is expecting you to take at least 12 CU during a 6 month term at $2890 per term and devote a minimum of 20 hours per week. Yes, for 5 years of schooling, a $30,000 BS degree is cheaper than most colleges. But is it better for me? I'm going to investigate other colleges and see what else I can find in comparison.