Cutting the Mustard Instead of the Cheese

Tweet

Living on a strict budget means giving up on finer quality foods. So when I was asked to give an honest review on two of Grey Poupon's latest specialty mustards, there was no pause between the request and my eager affirmative answer. Well, maybe a tiny pause when an immediate, uncontrollable drooling may have interrupted my response.

Since the 80s, Grey Poupon has been one of my favorite Dijon mustards. But I haven't bought any in several years. It's not that the Grey Poupon is expensive. But when you save a few cents here and there buying the cheap stuff, the savings add up --- especially when the cheap stuff turns you off of mustard all together. So after all of this time, would these new Kraft mustards be fitting of the Grey Poupon brand name? I got my answer a few days ago when I received "Hearty Spicy Brown" and "Harvest Course Ground" bottles. Like a Karl in "Slingblade", the first thing I had to have was some mustard 'n biscuits. A simple taste test, "Ummm Hmmm." Yet I almost hurt myself when I opened each of those jars; the tangy aroma caused my tongue to try and beat out my teeth and lips to get to that tantalizing taste. After sampling these two incredibly savory flavorings on bread, I had to try them on hamburgers.

Now I know that some of you believe that red meat is bad for you. From my experience, I have found red meat to be good but blue-green meat, now that is bad for you! So I coaxed a couple of fresh burgers into a mouth-watering, well-cooked, succulent state and spread each of the golden brown sauces on them. Usually, the pleasure of food is second to the pleasure of sex. But not this time! It's tastes like these that could make you become celibate. I have to hand it to Kraft for the way they added just the right amount of diced yellow onion in their "Hearty Spice Brown" mustard. And you might think that using the whole mustard seed in "Harvest Course Ground" would over-power the taste of the meat. But this isn't so. Even my hamburger begged for more of that mustard.

Finally, unlike other condiments in my fridge, the Grey Poupon bottles have a "best used by" date on the lids. Very helpful for a guy like me who often has to go by degree-of-fuzziness, color, or that ultimate of tests - "does this smell funny to you?" when cleaning out the ol' fridge.

All-in-all, I give these new Grey Poupon mustards two thumbs, 8 fingers and lickable knife up. I think I am going to have to put Grey Poupon back on my shopping list. Life is too short to miss out on pleasures like these.