There's a hurricane a-comin’. Oh boy! Even though hurricanes are generally a one day event, people around here tend to hit the stores and shop as though the end of the world was about to befall them.
So with Irene three days away, be sure to act now and stock up on the essentials: lots of toilet paper to handle your fear-induced emanations, enough bread to fill a small room as a large, moldy science project in a week’s time, a shiny new bathtub – preferably one of those fancier clawfoot tubs so that you can be tossed about the neighborhood in style by one of those pesky tornadoes – and, the most important item of all, beer.
Of course, the buying beer goes without saying. It also goes very quickly from the store on the slightest mention of weather. Nice sunny day? Need beer. Possible hurricane in a couple of weeks? Need more beer. Slight dampness in the air? By all means, beer … just not that dark heavy stuff. Save that for the thunderstorms.
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