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Monday, July 27, 2009

To The Moon

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I keep hearing discouraging stories about our lack of presence on the moon. Some blame the shortage of money and desire to mount expensive science expeditions. Others fault the extremely high start-up costs that prevent otherwise profitable mining operations on our shiny, celestial neighbor.

I think we could have quick and populated presence on the moon. It takes a simple realization of our heavenly orb for what it is: the best weight loss supplement known to man ... and woman. Just think, with a couple of day's journey, you could go from weighing 300 pounds to 50! All motion suddenly becomes effortless. No more shortness of breath and knee joint aches! An earthly fat farm could easily become an popular weight-loss lunar colony. And would you want leave your new found "slimness"? I don't think so, thus our permanent presence on the moon.

Of course, there would be restrictions. Some people would not be allowed, like supermodels who would suddenly becomes lighter than a newborn baby. All we need is for one of them to develop hiccups. Soon they would be bouncing off into space, crashing into arriving rockets. It might be fine as a pay-for-view event but we're trying to be serious here.

Oh sure, by now, a few of you are thinking, "With all those people, the gravitational attraction between the Earth and Moon will increase! Won't the Moon eventually crash into the Earth?" To you naysayers, let me say this, "How do you think we plan to move Mars closer to the Sun?" After all, the Moon is just a stepping buffet to the stars.

5 comments:

UPrinting said...

What you said about the supermodels is very funny! :D
But it's true that people weigh less in the moon. The catch though, if we don't require any effort to move anymore, we'll all gain weight eventually. Remember what happened to the humans in the film Wall-E? :)

plastik kart said...

From what is described how is the end prepared?

Drew said...

I think we should start worrying about putting the planet into drug rehab before we commit more money to space travel, and I LOVE astronomy, but yeesh. . . How will we ever explore the next frontier without taking care of our ridiculous problems on Earth?

new homes las vegas said...

It's true that people weigh less in the moon. The catch though, if we don't require any effort to move anymore, we'll all gain weight eventually.

proactol said...

Hi there

It s true people get weight less on moon. So it is easy to move there.Nice article!

Thanks
james