To get rid of your fears, you have to confront them. You must deal with your terrors head-on. Of course, if you fear standing in front of speeding trucks, this advice isn't the best to act on.
At the moment, I dread colonoscopies. I'm afraid of how it's going to affect my budget, of what the doctor might find, of being in that intimate position without somebody buying me dinner first.
I'm also terrorized of skydiving naked. Actually, that's more of one of those embarrassing dreams: I jump out of a plane, see a crowd of people looking up at me, and realize I'm not wearing anything – including a parachute.
How can I confront these two irrational concerns? What if I had the colonoscopy and then skydived while clothed with only a parachute? Ah, well, this scenario gives birth to horror number 3.
The moment I launch myself out from the soaring plane, an involuntary scream will try to escape, forcing my mouth open. Instantly, my cleared digestive track will turn me into a very loud human whistle.
My flute-like noise will cause people to look up and point as I streak audibly towards them. They will say "I heard him the instant he stepped from the plane. Talk about your early detection. Good thing he had that colonoscopy."
Perhaps I have nothing to fear aside from little embarrassment. And that arrest record for public indecency.
Maybe if I get a few piercings, I can play a catchy tune during my dive. No fears there.
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