Have you ever had one of those bosses who barely knows how you do your job and yet has no problem giving you advice on how to do your work? Last week, I was trying to reverse-engineer some code written by another employee. I believe his official title now is "former employee" because he got tired of the VP of engineering, who isn't a programmer, telling him how to program. That led to a confrontation between the two which resulted in the VP downsizing my fellow programmer into his new title.
Unfortunately, "former employee" didn't believe in documenting his work very well. So as I was paper deep in my diagrams and his code, praising his work in that universal programming language known as Profanity, who should appear at my back but our friendly and ever so helpful VP. "There is an awful lot of those semicolons in that code," he remarked. "You should give some thought to removing as many of those as you can. Sort of a really good colon cleanse." Then he gave his extremely annoying "I made a funny because I'm superior" toothy laugh. So I said "A really good colon cleanse will be when you leave the company."... to myself. Out loud, I answered "Yes, sir." He walked away with that smug look that he had saved the company and justified his exorbitant paycheck once again. As for me, I'm going to keep the semicolons in place. Not just because the program won't run without them... they do serve a purpose in life unlike some people. No, every time I begin to feel a little superior, I want them to remind me of that part of the human anatomy that I do not want to become to the good people around me.
Showing posts with label programming. Show all posts
Showing posts with label programming. Show all posts
Tuesday, March 11, 2008
Saturday, August 25, 2007
Programming for Fun and Profit
I have often heard that it is easy for programmers to make themselves indispensable to a company. Just keep your code cryptic and your documentation minimal if not, nonexistent. But these are just signs of a bad programmer and not of somebody that company could value.
Since I have never followed these ill-advised practices, perhaps that is why I am the only programmer left in my company. And now, my job function is in extremely high demand (though you never know how valuable I am from my pay raises, or lack thereof). So to try and make my job more accessible by the shrinking number of workers in our facility, I was able to convince my boss's boss to purchase a programming environment known as LabVIEW. Instead of writing thousands of lines of code and documentation, I can now drag and drop an icon of the function that I need. I can then draw a wire from the icon's inputs and outputs to that of other icons to create my program. Result is a picture that shows how the program flows in a way that almost anyone can understand. Amazingly, the size of the executable file has shrunken like a large person on a hoodia diet. So now I have a smaller, often times faster file that can be read and modified by someone other than me.
Now this doesn't mean I'm putting myself out of a job. Like any programming environment, LabVIEW has its own set of complexities and learning curve. But if I write my LabVIEW programs well with enough flexibility in them, someone else can be called to the floor to do the hand-holding that our production and sales often need. I can then spend my time more productively ... like looking for another job with a more appreciative company.
Since I have never followed these ill-advised practices, perhaps that is why I am the only programmer left in my company. And now, my job function is in extremely high demand (though you never know how valuable I am from my pay raises, or lack thereof). So to try and make my job more accessible by the shrinking number of workers in our facility, I was able to convince my boss's boss to purchase a programming environment known as LabVIEW. Instead of writing thousands of lines of code and documentation, I can now drag and drop an icon of the function that I need. I can then draw a wire from the icon's inputs and outputs to that of other icons to create my program. Result is a picture that shows how the program flows in a way that almost anyone can understand. Amazingly, the size of the executable file has shrunken like a large person on a hoodia diet. So now I have a smaller, often times faster file that can be read and modified by someone other than me.
Now this doesn't mean I'm putting myself out of a job. Like any programming environment, LabVIEW has its own set of complexities and learning curve. But if I write my LabVIEW programs well with enough flexibility in them, someone else can be called to the floor to do the hand-holding that our production and sales often need. I can then spend my time more productively ... like looking for another job with a more appreciative company.
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