planning to survive

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Well, it is hurricane season and I'm not talking about the North Carolina hockey team. With this year's dire predictions, I find myself worrying about my emergency supplies: "What do I have?" (Not enough.) "What do I need?" (A hiding place far, far away.) Those repetitive thoughts then make me think about what I would might need after a disaster strikes. Did I pay that last insurance bill after I told the agent were to go? Where should I hide my valuable papers? How much bribe money will I need? From here, it's just a short jump to "what happens if I die?" "Is my will up to date?" "Would Bob's Crematorium and Grill be open for the funeral and the dinner afterwards?" These responsibilities of being an adult didn't seem to be that important a decade ago. ::: sigh ::: Maybe I'll just go down to Sam's Club, buy one of those large barrels of wine and preserve myself in that.

Emergency Kits

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After yesterday's tremendous storms and tornado warnings, I realize that I need to rethink what I have in my emergency kits. With today's unbelievable high winds, I think I'd better add a 5000 pound cinder block complete with chain to keep me anchored to the earth. Of course, I need the other staples of survival: beer, bread, water, beer, first kit, batteries, beer, matches, flashlight, canned spam, radio and of course the all important medicine - whiskey - just want the doctor ordered for sleepless nights, paper cuts, and cooking. Well, cooking in the sense you need to kill the taste of canned spam when real food isn't available during those dire times of emergency.